


paper oasis

by Alania



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Archeologist Ben, Ben finds out he kind of likes pain, F/M, Feral Rey, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rey has very sharp teeth and claws, Rough Sex, TRACKS AU, tarzan au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:40:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25663762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alania/pseuds/Alania
Summary: She was small and undernourished. How could she be anything but, if she lived out in the desert alone? He’d seen a herd of some deerlike creature almost two days ago, but other than that the only life he’d ever seen out here were the scorpions, the hardy plant life, and her.She reminded Ben of that scraggy plant life, now that he got a good look at her. Thin, colorful, strong, and so, so very stubborn.She crawled back towards him slowly, an inch at a time, still resting on her knuckles as she moved with constant hesitation. When she reached him again, she stretched out one hand and poked his arm, his chest, his hip.He had the strangest inclination that she was testing to see if he was worth killing for food.
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo
Comments: 35
Kudos: 91
Collections: Reylo Hidden Gems





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to my first Reylo multichapter fic! This is based off a drabble I wrote many years ago for Persimonne about feral Rey with hints of Tarzan. Ben and Poe are archaeologists out in an extremely remote and uninhabited desert region, searching for rare finds. They find one.
> 
> Writing this fic is my way of relaxing a little, trying out something new, and just trying to enjoy writing again. Chapters will probably be short to keep things light and fun. It won't get dark but I still smell some angst in the future because of course I do. 
> 
> Moodboard by folklxre on Twitter!!

It had been three days since their little makeshift camp had been visited. Ben was sure they’d seen the last of the culprit, but his excavation partner stubbornly disagreed. Nevertheless, he failed to lock up the supplies that night, perhaps out of sheer stubbornness. They’re in the middle of the desert, for crying out loud; nothing was out there with them, stealing their food at night. Dameron claimed he’d seen a beast come in and swipe their meals, but there’d been no sign of it for days and Ben was starting to wonder if the phenomenon of mirages extended to seeing animals stealing from you. Of course, that would mean Poe had subconsciously taken the meals himself - and Ben wasn’t quite ready to label his best friend psychotic just yet. 

Poe was already in the camper, hiding from the chill of a cold desert gloom. Ben had lingered. Their work left them sweltering in the hot sun daily - and the frigid temperature of the night felt good on an overheated body, especially one that wasn’t used to the heat.

So Ben soaked in the last remnants of the day by nearly freezing himself near the fire. He huddled in, holding his hands out to keep his extremities warm.

His fingers were long and chaffed from digging. They left shadows that danced wild and free against the sand beside the firepit.

It was there in the shadows that he saw the start of more figures dancing than the ones his own fingers were shadow puppeteering. He followed the trail of shadow to its root and found small, dirty hands that were reaching up curiously towards the fire. 

He’d found Poe’s burglar, but it wasn’t an animal. It would have made more sense if it was.

The girl was covered in rags that tore across her body, nothing more than jagged strips of animal hide bleached out by the sun. She wasn’t reaching out to the fire for warmth, as he was. Her fingers were edging closer and closer; he could recognize that look in her alarmingly wide eyes anywhere. She was curious - as if she had no idea what the fire was, or how it was going to affect her fingers if she got any closer.

_She didn’t_ , he suddenly realized. She must have never laid eyes on fire in her life; it felt so implausible, and unrealistic, but so did the idea of finding anyone alive out here in the desert wastes. According to logic, the girl shouldn’t exist at all.

She crept her hands closer, finally too close for his comfort. He reached out and pulled her hand away to save her the trouble of getting burned, but he should have known better than to touch someone so feral. She let out a hiss when she pulled her hand away, baring her jagged teeth at him dangerously. Then she hopped away to put distance between them.

He could hardly see her in the dark, once she managed to get far enough. All he could see was the intimidating glare of her yellow eyes, reflecting the light of his fire.

“Hey.” He whispered out, only managing to make her back up further. She was on all fours, resting her hands on her knuckles, and every muscle in her body was coiled to spring. She was ready to bolt if he gave her any reason. So he stilled, and gave her no reason.

“I didn’t mean to scare you. Come on back.” He locked eyes with her, his head tilting to the side. His mind chanted with the hope that Poe stayed in the camper, else he wake and scare her off. His voice never drifted louder than a whisper as a result. But she wasn’t responding to his calls, so he turned back to the fire, and pulled his eyes away from the two little yellow dots glaring back at him from a distance.

If she was curious enough to touch a fire, she might be curious enough to return; but he didn’t have high hopes.

When he’d finally stopped waiting, and lost himself in the comforting warmth of the fire, he heard the sound of shifting sand behind him. His back straightened, conflicted over whether to turn or not. 

He felt her fingers poking curiously against his hair until they threaded into it and tugged.

“Ow.” His head barely inclined at the tug, but it gave him the chance to look back at her, which immediately had her shuffling away. She was small and undernourished. How could she be anything but, if she lived out in the desert alone? He’d seen a herd of some deerlike creature almost two days ago, but other than that the only life he’d ever seen out here were the scorpions, the hardy plant life, and her.

She reminded him of that scraggy plant life, now that he got a good look at her. Thin, colorful, strong, and so, so very stubborn. 

She crawled back towards him slowly, an inch at a time, still resting on her knuckles as she moved with constant hesitation. When she reached him again, she stretched out one hand and poked his arm, his chest, his hip. 

He had the strangest inclination that she was testing to see if he was worth killing for food.

Then she reached further and started burying nosy hands into his pockets, searching him rudely. Before he could pull her hand away, she’d grabbed a brush from his pocket, and skittered away several feet with her find. She put it in her mouth, gnawing on the cleaning brush with sharp teeth that would leave marks against the handle.

“Hey. Stop that, that’s not food. Come on, I need that.” 

She was hungry. (Could he really be surprised?) He needed her to stop chewing on his cleaning brush before she destroyed it, however; which meant he was going to have to give her something better to chew on. Like actual food.

He opened up one of the meal packets, and the brush fell out of her mouth immediately. She recognized it. She knew whatever was in those was edible, because she’d stolen from them before; and her eyes were rounded so wide that he wondered how they fit in that thin, sharp-featured face of hers.

He felt a stab of pity for just how thin she was.

“You want some?” He asked her, pulling out the roll and throwing it in her direction. The brush was abandoned in favor of it, and she let out a garbled sound as she scrambled to catch and devour the little round roll.

It was gone before he’d even seen her chew it. _Geez, kid._ He thought to himself. _You need help._

He ruminated over the idiotic notion that he, Ben Solo, the most callous archaeologist known to the community at large, was considering offering that help. He wouldn’t be given the chance to wonder too long; she’d made enough noise to wake Poe, who opened up the camper door and walked up towards the fire.

Before Ben could say a word, the girl shot past him wildly, grabbing the open tray of food and disappearing into the night with it. He couldn’t even see her eyes anymore; Poe’s unexpected appearance had completely run her off.

“What the hell was that?” Poe had seen something barely attack Ben, before running away, but it was simply too quick to get a good look at it. So his eyes widened and glimmered with excitement, and he crouched down beside Ben to give him a wide, shit-eating grin. “That was it, wasn’t it? I was right! Tell me I was right!”

Ben was still watching the black emptiness where she’d disappeared, but that did not stop him from reaching out and toppling Poe off of his hunched position with a hard push.

“You were right about one thing. There’s something out there, all right.” He muttered, his calm voice tempering the excited stutter of his heart. “Or someone.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She dropped onto her side and curled up instead, as the reflection of firelight flickered visibly in her eyes.
> 
> They were light, Ben realized. A light, hazel brown. He couldn’t tell if the fire was toying with his ability to see their true color, but if he looked hard enough, he was fairly certain of it.
> 
> Rey’s eyes flickered from the fire to catch his intense gaze when she’d felt it on her. She stared back. Hard.
> 
> It was Ben who finally forced himself to look away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was part 2 of the drabble. After this will be all new stuff! 
> 
> Moodboard by folklxre on Twitter!

He knew that old warning against feeding a stray. He knew it and used it to his advantage. If he’d been thinking clearer, Ben might not have been so quick to decide on luring the girl back into their encampment. He wasn’t always awake, and their supplies were dwindling by the day. For all he knew, she could rob them blind and leave them to starve in the desert.

He left the rations pack out every evening regardless. He could blame it on the overwhelming heat if he needed an excuse for his erratic behavior. He could say it was dehydration clouding his judgment. He had lots of excuses queued up if it ever came to that.

But for now, Poe didn’t question his curiosity over their nocturnal visitor, because he was just as enraptured by the implausibility of it. A lone feral girl should have died long ago out in the desert. And yet here she was, more skin and bone than human but alive nonetheless, eating their ration packs whole.

Plastic included.

Ben was going to have to remember to unwrap them before he unintentionally poisoned their little guest.

“Where do you think she came from?” Poe whispered as they both watched the girl devouring a pack of beef jerky whole. “She doesn’t look like she’s had any human interaction at all. And her teeth - you realize she could shred us in minutes, don’t you?”

Ben snorted at the slight tremble of fear in Poe’s voice as he imagined the girl tearing his throat out. “Not if we keep feeding her, she won’t.”

He felt Poe’s eyes on him, heavy. “How can you be so sure of that? And for the record? I’m still not comfortable with this new side of you. Humanitarian Ben Solo? If I came back telling that story, I’d be locked up for good.”

Ben stoked the fire with a stick, forcing embers to spit and spark upward as more synthwood caught flame. The sudden sound of the crackling fire startled the girl, who sat mere feet away from them this time. She’d been coming closer with every visit, as they slowly built their trust with her. Now she was close enough for the fire to illuminate every scar, every bite on her skin. There was no doubt she’d led a difficult life.

“Not if we take her with us.”

Poe’s laughter was intentionally soft so as not to alarm the girl. She’d finished her meal, and this was when she normally skittered away. Now, she sat near the fire, her wide eyes wondering at the warmth it was emitting. She’d long since learned not to touch it, her fingertips sporting fresh burns from the lesson. She dropped onto her side and curled up instead, as the reflection of firelight flickered visibly in her eyes.

They were light, Ben realized. A light, hazel brown. He couldn’t tell if the fire was toying with his ability to see their true color, but if he looked hard enough, he was fairly certain of it.

Rey’s eyes flickered from the fire to catch his intense gaze when she’d felt it on her. She stared back. Hard.

It was Ben who finally forced himself to look away.

“You’re serious.” Poe’s laughter had long since died after watching the silent interaction, and there was skeptical awe in his voice. “You think we can actually lure her enough to follow us all the way home. And once we’re there? What then? Ben, she lives like a beast. They’re going to lock her up in some home for derelicts and throw away the key.”

Ben’s back straightened so aggressively that the gesture caught the girl by surprise, lifting her head and glaring at him with narrowed eyes. He was looking at Poe, not her, and after a moment Rey decided it wasn’t her concern and laid her head back down in the sand.

“No one’s going to _lock her up,_ ” Ben warned, a threat hidden in his voice. Poe’s hands lifted in the air with innocence.

“Chill out. I’m not saying I want her locked up. But you’ve gotta admit that people aren’t going to be kind. Think logically, Ben. Think about how the government usually handles an illegal immigrant. Now apply that to her and tack on the fact that she’s more feral than a wild cat.”

Poe took a long swig of the canteen in his hands, and let his eyes wander to the girl. He shook his head with dismay. “People are assholes, man. Taking her somewhere like this - it’s a bad idea.”

Rey’s stomach grumbled, and she curled into herself tighter in response. Ben felt like he’d lost his appetite around the time Poe had reminded him of what humans do with someone different from them, so he unwrapped the rest of his pre-packaged meal and shook it to get her attention.

She was on all fours instantly, her eyes transfixed on the meal. He moved to hold it out for her, preparing to stretch himself enough to put it closer to her reach.

He needn’t have bothered.

It took him a few seconds to realize she was crawling forward, slow and hesitant. When it dawned on him, his arm pulled back towards himself again, slowly luring her forward. He was still and calm, but his heart pounded so hard that he wondered if she could hear it through his chest.

Poe had stilled beside him, as well. Rey kept her eyes moving from the food, to Ben, to Poe, as if waiting for one of them to pounce her in a trap. When neither of them moved, she inched closer and closer.

Ben perched his meal on his knee, and let his hands fall loose by his sides. She paused when she saw it and sniffed the air. He could see her deciding, in the flicker of her eyes. Whether it was worth the risk. Whether she could trust him.

 _Oh, God,_ He begged in the privacy of his mind. _Please trust me._

On her knees and knuckles she lurched forward, swiping the meal from his knee and pulling it towards her. He assumed this was as good as it would get, but it was still a huge development. He moved to turn towards Poe and give him a triumphant smile, but froze before his lips could rise.

She’d dragged the meal towards him, and climbed into his lap.

She was eating from the hard plate, her face smashed against it, while curled up like a devoted pet against him.

He couldn’t breathe.

“Oh,” Poe whispered in an exhale, his voice shaking with awe beside him. “This just got a hell of a lot more complicated.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ben likes trouble its fine, everything is fine


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He reached out a hand, very slowly, and uncurled his fingers for her. She stared at his long fingers, but instead of putting her own hand in his, she leaned in to sniff the hand.
> 
> Her tongue slipped out to lick at the tip of one of his fingers.
> 
> Ben wasn’t breathing anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who the hell invited plot in here?!

Progression was slow but steady. With each passing day, Ben saw a change in the woman visiting his camp. She kept a schedule that he could rely on; she would show up right as he settled down for dinner with Poe, and stayed to enjoy the warm fire for the night. By the time he woke up in the morning, she was always gone. But he looked out of the tiny window beside his cot sometimes when his thoughts wouldn’t let him fall asleep, and always saw her there, curled up beside the fire. More often than not, she was awake the entire night long. Ben had to imagine that she slept somewhere safe and shaded during the day, to get away from the unrelenting burn of the scorching sun. 

He wished he had that luxury. But he was here to work.

She never followed them when they mounted the camels and trekked down to the dig site in the mornings. He knew this because he was always looking for her. His eyes kept lifting from his work, wandering, searching. 

His distractions had become a growing nuisance to his colleague, who more often than not caught Ben staring down at an artifact with his brush in his hands. His thumb moved in circles against the brush hilt to feel the ridges that had been left by her teeth. Then he would feel the heat of Poe’s judgemental glare on his skin and snap himself out of it.

This uneasy routine continued for weeks. Poe’s frustration was exacerbated by the lack of any decent finds. Pottery and tools were a dime a dozen - what Poe _really_ wanted them to uncover was -

“Uh.”

Ben’s hand stilled as he uttered the sound. He was looking down at a white bump in the dirt with confusion, which was enough to get Poe on his feet. The closer he got, the more he wanted to whoop for joy.

That was _definitely_ bone.

“Finally, something interesting.” Poe breathed out, crouching down to give Ben’s find a careful look. The excitement in his face faded when he caught on to the same problem that Ben had noticed. He reached down to dig with his fingers until he could expose more of it. 

“Uh,” Poe repeated Ben’s utterance, equally mystified at the sight of the skull in the ground. It was bleached white from the sun, but either this skull had managed to find a perfect spot in the ground to protect itself for thousands of years, or they were looking at the remains of a very recent death.

Ben swallowed, his throat sticking with dryness. He stood to get a case of delicate tools for extraction, and then returned to settle in and begin the long process of finding as much of the remains as he could. Without a word, Poe joined him. It took them the rest of the day, but in the end they managed to discover and extract half of one skeleton, almost a fourth of a second, and a few scattered remains of others.

A family. An entire village, perhaps. Buried and crushed under tons of rock, dirt, and sand. From the breaks in limbs and divots in skulls, Ben concluded there must have been a very serious cave-in that killed them all.

It killed them all very, very recently. Many of the remains they’d found still had wisps of flesh, hardy tendons, or cartilage that had refused to give in to nature as quickly as the rest. Ben felt a sick twist in the pit of his stomach as he laid them out on mats, trying to discern what part belonged to whom.

The sun had already begun to dip threateningly far when Poe finally pressed a hand to his friend's shoulder and pulled him away. “Ben, they’re just going to take them away and bury them. We can’t help them, anymore.”

Ben studied the tibia he’d been trying to place for a moment longer, before finally dropping it gently down on a mat and covering the entire skeleton with a sheet. As he hovered over the skull, he paused. The sheet was pulled down again. He hadn’t given the front of the skulls a proper look when he found them, but now he reached out and took one into his hands, turning it to the side to get a better look at the few teeth that remained unbroken in the skull. 

They were sharp. Like an animal.

“Oh, holy shit,” Poe whispered behind him.

He dropped the skull as if it had scalded him. Poe had noticed the same thing he had, which led both men to one very sad conclusion.

The girl.

This was why she was out in a desert that no one had yet to explore. This was why she was so feral, so different.

And so alone.

Ben covered up the remains with sheets again and began to pack up in order to hurry back to the camp.

* * *

She was already waiting for them by the time they reached camp. Her hand was digging into the unlit fire pit, searching for something - the secret to fire, perhaps. When she heard them coming she stopped sifting through the ash and screeched with dismay just loud enough to let them know how displeased she was at their tardiness. 

Ben slid off of the camel and tied it to a camper pole. “Yes, yes, I know. We’re very sorry.”

She screeched again - his answer did nothing to calm her temper. She was hopping closer, sniffing the air for any unfamiliar scent. Instead, she caught something that had her sitting back on her haunches with confusion.

Ben unhooked his pack from the camel and patted the animal on the back. Then he wiped his hands clean with a cloth and opened up a container to get her some food. With two rations packs in hand, he sat near the fire while Poe worked to start it up again. He only noticed her sudden stillness after he’d settled and opened one of the packs.

“Come on. You’re not really going to hold a grudge, are you?” His deep voice murmured as he held out the rations pack and shook it. He could tell he had all of her attention, but she stayed where she was. He shook it again - he saw her muscles tense, ready to pounce for the food, but something held her back.

She sniffed the air again.

Ben’s face pinched with thought as he caught the act. Did he smell bad? Or wrong, somehow?

The girl finally crept closer as hunger won over her discomfort. She managed to grab the rations pack from his hands and pull it into her lap, but she did not crawl into his as she’d gotten used to doing lately. She stayed several feet away and kept her eyes focused sternly on him even as her face smashed down into the plastic container to lap up the food it held.

Ben lifted his collar to his nose and smelled it. Dirt, sand, and the salt of sweat was all he could catch, nothing new. A wild thought toyed with him as he watched her eat; but the mere idea of this woman holding on to the memory of another person’s scent - or even less likely, the possibility that scent was still available when there was nothing left but bone…

He decided it was more likely that she knew the general smell of the dig site. It broke his heart to assume that Rey had any memory of what might have happened around there when she was just a tiny thing. He imagined her, barefoot and scrappy, fighting to survive in a place where not much could.

He had no reason to feel the swell of pride that ached in his chest, because he had no part in her life or her struggle. But he felt it. He was so proud of her.

She lifted her head and licked her lips, but most of the food she’d eaten was still covering her face. The hesitation from before seemed already waning in the distraction of food. She waddled closer on her back feet, crouched down in a squat as she moved. Her hands held out the empty plastic to him.

Ben took it and set it beside him to throw away with his own. Then he reached out a hand, very slowly, and uncurled his fingers for her. She stared at his long fingers, but instead of putting her own hand in his, she leaned in to sniff the hand.

Her tongue slipped out to lick at the tip of one of his fingers.

Ben wasn’t breathing anymore.

She bent in again and sniffed at the palm of his hand until his fingers curled around her face. His thumb brushed across the rough, dirty skin of her cheek to clean the food away. The gesture was rewarded; her head turned to bump and rub against his palm. She knew affection. Understood it. Craved it.

He brushed her cheek and hair with his hand seven times as he exhaled a long breath. On the eighth brush, Rey turned her head quickly and bit down on his fingertips.

 _"Ow, what the fuck..”_ His words drawled out as he snapped his hands away in surprise, and looked down to the tiny pinpricks that beaded up blood on his fingers. Beside him Poe was barking with laughter, unable to contain himself. The sound offended Rey, and she backed away a few steps to huff at him. When he didn’t stop laughing, she picked up a rock from the ground and hurled it Poe’s way.

The laughter stopped when the rock slammed against his bicep.

“You little-” Poe’s immediate response was to scramble to his feet and search for the rock in order to throw it back at her, but she was already bounding away from the fire. Ben reached out with the hand he wasn't sucking on and tugged Poe back down to the ground.

“Stop it, you’re scaring her.”

“I’m scaring _her_?!” Poe exclaimed. “She threw a rock at me! She _bit_ you! I’m not real worried about how she feels right now.” He rubbed his bicep with one hand sullenly, and added as a muttered afterthought, “Probably gonna have a bruise the size of your big head tomorrow.”

Ben stayed quiet, letting Rey slowly hop her way back to the camp. She gave one last huff at Poe before settling down beside Ben’s knee. Her chin rested against it, contrite.

“Hope you didn’t get a taste for me, little one.” Ben murmured with weak amusement around the fingers he still sucked. “I’m not on the menu.”

She rolled around on her back, craning her neck up to look at him. He knew that move. He’d seen his old dog Chewie pull it on him after he’d destroyed a living room rug. Guilt-led submission.

It felt strangely uncomfortable to look at. He patted her head just once to signify that she was forgiven, before going back to his meal. A glance at Poe told him that the other man was watching, waiting for Rey to make another bad move.

She did not give him the pleasure. She remained exactly where she was, shuffling just enough to press her back against Ben’s thick thigh. Eventually, her eyes closed - Ben couldn’t tell if she was actually asleep, but he wasn’t dumb enough to try and wake her to find out.

“When are we going to talk about this?” Poe asked, keeping his voice hushed for the same reason Ben wasn’t touching the girl. “It’s getting a little out of hand, don’t you think?”

“It’s fine,” Ben picked at his food nervously. “She’s fine. We’re fine. There’s nothing to talk about.”

“I’m calling the base in the morning.” Poe reminded him. He had the decency to say it gently. “To coordinate the pick up on those-”

Ben hushed him, which made Poe roll his eyes.

“She doesn’t understand us, Benny.”

It was true, but Ben felt no better about mentioning the remains around her.

“What do we tell the pick-up crew? About her?” Poe threw the leftovers of his food into the fire and then stood. “If they see her, they’re not gonna let it go.”

Ben swallowed. He looked down at the woman pressed against his side, and observed the way her chest rose and fell in slow, deep breaths. She felt safe enough to sleep against him. He didn’t _know_ what he was going to do about her.

“They won’t see her,” Ben said. “They’re going straight to the dig site. She stays away from there - ”

He paused when he realized the reason why he never saw Rey near the dig site. She _did_ know the smell of the area. Of her own kind. Of their mass grave.

God, this poor girl.

“It’ll work out,” Ben promised. His hand finally pressed against her sleeping form, and her entire body turned to burrow itself deeper into his warmth. What was he _doing_?

He couldn’t stop petting her.

“It will work out. It has to.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The rest of the morning would be spent watching her sleep peacefully against him. He dared brush her hair out of her face when it fell into her eyes, and dared further to continue the trail with his fingers as he traced the lines of her sharp jaw and chin. Here in sleep, she looked more peaceful than he’d ever seen her. Nothing troubled her, for once. She looked like she felt perfectly… safe.
> 
> It was a feeling she must not often have the luxury of, living out in the wilderness as she did.
> 
> A different sense of peace infused itself into Ben’s soul as he watched her, and let the hours tick by. Here in the dark and quiet, where someone so fragile had put all of her faith in him, he found something warm and fuzzy clinging to his rough edges.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter specific warning: blood, injury

Ben woke to the sound of scratching at the camper door. The first licks of early sunrise were faint, as was the gentle scrape of nails at the door. When he stood up to investigate, he heard the loud honk of a brutal snore from Poe’s corner, and tiptoed past it to refrain from waking him.

He pulled back the tiny blackout curtain that blocked light from the window at the top of the steel door and looked down to see what kind of animal was trying to make its way inside.

He saw nothing. His head craned as far as it could, but the window afforded him little in the way of a view. He wasn’t naive enough to open it to check, so he stayed where he was, and listened for the scratches again.

They had stopped.

A few silent seconds passed before the terrifying close up of Rey’s face popped out from beneath the blind spot under the window, nearly stopping Ben’s heart with surprise. He’d managed to stifle down the scream that threatened to claw its way up his throat, but it felt like his heart was beating hard enough to wake the dead. He listened for a moment to check, but Poe was still snoring like a beast.

And Rey was still staring at him, just the top of her head visible as she peered through the window with darting eyes.

It was probably a terrible mistake to open the door and let her inside. He knew this. He also knew that he’d been making nothing but mistakes since he’d first laid eyes on her, and today was not meant to be an exception.

He opened the door as quietly as he could. Rey backed away and stared at this new, unfamiliar territory, before hopping back towards him. She remained in the doorway and looked up at him with an expression he’d never seen on her face before. It was the first time she looked more human than animal; Ben wondered at this change, even as his heart broke when it registered the loneliness visible in her eyes. 

She’d have left the camp by now on a normal day. She’d run off to her hideaway, safe and secure - 

And alone.

She reached out with the back of her hand until her knuckles pressed against his bare feet. Just a brush, like a caress. She looked like she was trying _so hard_ to tell him something. To _ask_ for something.

He didn’t have the heart to deny her a single thing in the world.

When he backed away, she craned her head into the doorway and looked around, all the tension returning to her taut muscles. Something told Ben she didn’t like closed spaces, and coming into the camper would be a nightmare for her - so he didn’t attempt to coerce her, whether it be with food or soft words. He simply stood there and watched her explore with her eyes until she could make her own decision.

She sniffed the floor. Ben winced as her little nose touched the filthy tile that the two men hadn’t ever found the desire to clean. Then she put her knuckles down and pushed herself inside, slinking in hesitantly. As soon as she’d found the courage to enter, however, her curiosity took over.

Everything was worth a sniff. The dirty laundry (Ben winced again), the shoes under the beds, the curtains hiding Poe (she’d almost sprinted at the first snore and Ben couldn’t even blame her), and eventually, the wrinkled sheets of his own open bed. She took extra care when she found them, burying her head into the scent until she was sure this was what she was looking for.

Ben’s nest.

“Wait-” He whispered, a second too late. Her entire body climbed up onto the bed and curled into the sheets, making herself at home. He could see all of the sand and dirt that covered her skin staining every inch of his bed.

His shoulders slumped.

When she rose her head from the curled up position, it tilted expectantly as she watched him. He tried to decipher why she looked so impatient, until it hit him.

She meant to claim his nest, not for herself, but to share. She was waiting for him to go back to sleep.

With sheets covered in sand.

What a disaster.

Ben moved carefully, trying to situate himself as far under the sheets as possible. He could still feel the scratchy grains on his skin, but he wasn’t prepared to deny her this. Or anything. He _was_ going to fix this situation in the morning, however.

He pulled the privacy curtain closed and made himself as comfortable as he could. As soon as his head dropped on the pillow, he felt her shift until she had uncurled herself just enough to come closer and bury herself in the crook of one of his arms. She had so much experience with making her body fit in tiny spaces for safety, and it came in handy here. She burrowed her face against his armpit (he winced yet again, for his own lack of hygiene), and almost immediately fell into a light sleep.

He did not.

The rest of the morning would be spent watching her sleep peacefully against him. He dared brush her hair out of her face when it fell into her eyes, and dared further to continue the trail with his fingers as he traced the lines of her sharp jaw and chin. Here in sleep, she looked more peaceful than he’d ever seen her. Nothing troubled her, for once. She looked like she felt perfectly… safe.

It was a feeling she must not often have the luxury of, living out in the wilderness as she did.

A different sense of peace infused itself into Ben’s soul as he watched her, and let the hours tick by. Here in the dark and quiet, where someone so fragile had put all of her faith in him, he found something warm and fuzzy clinging to his rough edges. It felt a little like floating, and he lingered in its spell until the sun lifted high enough to peek through the tiny window just above his bed. By then, Poe was waking up; and that was enough to have Rey awaken, alert and tensed for danger. Poe was whistling as he performed his morning faculties, so it was easy to keep track of where he was until he stopped.

Fifteen very worrisome seconds passed before Ben’s privacy curtain was yanked away by an unsuspecting Poe, followed by a too-loud “Well good morning, sunshine!” 

Rey moved so fast it was hard to do anything but let it happen. She sprung upward towards the only exit she could get to and tore her way past Ben with struggling hands and feet until she could climb out of his tiny window and drop down to the ground below. In her haste, she couldn’t have realized how many times she’d used his body as leverage to get up there, or how deep her nails could burrow into his skin in order to do it.

The two men could still hear her screeching as she disappeared into the sandy dunes. Poe stared with open-mouthed shock at the scratches all over Ben’s arms, legs, and chest. Mostly superficial, and yet brutal to look at.

“What in the _fuck_ just happened, my dude.”

The stings of all of Ben’s new injuries were slow to hurt him. He was still a little lost in that feeling just before Poe had woken her, and he wasn’t quite ready to let that feeling go. 

When the pain came, it too felt fuzzy around the edges, softened by the idea of whose claws had caused it. He felt marked. Maybe a little bit claimed.

Maybe a little bit feral.

“Ben.” Poe snapped his fingers in front of Ben’s face. “Buddy. Wake up. You’re bleeding all over your bed. How the hell did she even get in - whoa whoa, where are you going?!”

Ben hadn’t waited for Poe to finish asking questions. He got up, balled every sheet from his bed, including the pillowcase, and hurried out the door.

He relented a second after he’d left the camper, and backed up to stick his head back in. “I need to wash these. And really, I could use a wash too. I’m headed to the creek; I’ll be back before midday.”

“Ben, _stop._ ” Poe stormed forward, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Are you sure you’re okay? You’re bleeding all over. I can get the med-kit, patch you up first-”

Ben winced as the cut under Poe’s hand stung with real pain this time. He shook his head. “I appreciate that, but I need to wash them before we cover them up. I’ll be quick if I take the car, we’ve saved enough gas. Then you can play nurse with me all day.”

Poe grabbed the side of Ben’s head and pushed it hard enough to make the man stumble back out of the door. “In your wildest dreams, you perverted shit. Get out of my sight, you stink.”

Ben was in the Jeep and on his way without another word. Poe watched him drive off as a sinking feeling began to worry at him. His eyes searched the campsite for any sign of the girl warily, before he headed back into the camper and caught sight of their laundry basket.

He groaned. “You could have at least taken that with you, damn it.”

Internally, he made a note to remember to ask the man why he’d found the girl in bed with Ben as soon as he returned. Poe wasn’t just going to let that particular tidbit slide.

* * *

The Jeep roared noisily through the dunes. Ben had no reason to watch his rearview mirror as he drove, but when something caught his eye he bent in to get a better look, and almost swallowed his tongue.

She was _following_ him. Granted, the Jeep couldn’t drive quickly on the sand and he could see she was losing ground the longer he drove, but she was still _trying_. He brought the car to a rolling halt to let her catch up, and heard the noisy thump of her body clamor its way into the open back.

He turned around just in time to see her face an inch from his, frowning in dismay. She could see the blood trickling from his body, and knew instantly what had caused it.

“Shhh,” He whispered soothingly. “It’s okay. I’m fine, see? Look, nothing a little cold water won’t fix.” He moved his arms in circular motions, ignoring the stabbing pains of stretching his cuts in favor of calming her nerves.

She sat back in the truck and bent down until her nose was pressed against the edge of the truck just behind his seat. Her eyes were so wide and expressive in their sincere regret. Ben’s entire body shook from the force of this one shameful look.

He held his hand out for her. She leaned forward and sniffed it, before her head bent to press her cheek against the offered palm. He hoped she would understand this as forgiveness.

They continued forward in silence, with Rey holding on to the back of the truck for dear life. She kept checking every side of the back for a safe place to jump out, but never managed to take the plunge. When they arrived at the scraggly little creek covered in hardy wildlife, she tumbled out of the Jeep and kicked it with the back of one foot.

She hated it.

Her anger made Ben laugh, even as he unloaded the sheets and took them into the water. He was still wearing his pajama pants, but he pulled off his sandals before he entered the creek. He laid the sheets against a rock to deal with later, and then sunk down as far as he could until his knees hit the rocks below. Then he leaned backward, and let the gently flowing water envelop every inch of him.

He could feel every cut now, as they burned singularly with the force of water brushing across their ragged edges. He closed his eyes and gritted his teeth against the pain, and let the cold numb the angry skin until the blood stopped staining the water with its flow.

When he opened his eyes again, the girl was just above him, crouched carefully on a rock. She’d leaned in to put her face an inch from his once more, and her eyes darted from one feature to the next. She looked like she was studying him, or committing him to memory. And yet by the way she stood, and how quickly her eyes moved, everything about her still seemed so flighty.

It made his heart ache to think of her running now, after the last few days. 

He reached up and scrubbed his hair, washing all of the grime and sand out. Then he sat back up and slicked the wet hair out of his face.

She reached out and tugged on a clean tendril of his hair, making it bounce with her fingers. As she played, he eyed her critically, from top to bottom.

“All right.” He barked out, filled with determination. “That’s it. You’re getting a bath.”

Rey knew none of the words he’d just spoken. And yet somehow, just by judging the look in his eye, she seemed to back up off her haunches as if she might need to run.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry to disappoint anyone who thought poe was about to get a claw to the face, he lives another day!!
> 
> please place your bets now on whether ben survives the next chapter or not


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I don’t know how to help you.” Kylo whispered as she inched closer. 
> 
> Her fingers were on the move, exploring the hills of his arms and shoulders as if she might find something of interest there. He shuddered. “I don’t know if I even should."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter specific warnings: implied nudity, extremely brief sexual intimacy.

The strategy of moving slow and keeping his intentions hidden could only work for so long. While sitting in the brook, Kylo had reached his hand out and she’d taken it, but pulling her closer had already been a struggle. So he let her sit in the water beside him, acclimating to the temperature and soaking harmlessly.

As she sat there and watched him with her clever eyes, he finished scrubbing dirt off of his skin. He gambled on her having some sense of decorum when it came to the private areas of the human body, but as soon as he started to pull his pants off he knew he was going to lose that bet. Rey went from anxious to curious in seconds, bending her head closer to the water to try and see better. Was she expecting something different? Did she have any memories of the opposite sex from her childhood? Or was she just curious about any part of him that she hadn’t yet seen before?

Ben had to guess the latter when she reached out to turn him around and proceeded to stare at his butt for a full minute. When she escalated her curiosity to poking, he let out a yelp and finally pulled away.

“Okay. Hands off, especially under the water.” The cuts on his skin were a testament to what the girl’s claws could do, and he wanted none of that near his tender parts. 

He ducked down deeper until the water's surface hit his chin, and the girl copied his movements. Good, he thought. Maybe he could just make her wash herself.

His hand lifted to scrub the pit under his arm vigorously in an attempt to get her to follow. She watched for a beat too long, before finally raising her arm and splashing water around her armpit a bit.

Close enough.

“Now the next one,” He murmured gently, lifting his other arm. She looked confused at his sudden words, but he still copied his actions easily as he continued to move across the rest of his body. She ran her hands down her arm and across her chest when he did, and even managed to slow in time with him when he lingered. With each passing moment, a tension began to form between them. He could feel the charge in the air, so thick he could almost see it. His hands fell limp and he sat there in the water motionlessly as he considered it. This displeased her as he gave her nothing more to copy, and she let out a sharp sound of unhappiness from the back of her throat.

He ignored it.

She did it again.

His lips parted to say something, but the words died in his throat. She was stomping closer out of impatience, splashing towards him. When she was inches away, she reached out and picked up his arm to try and make it do _something_. The demand forced a grin out of him, and it stretched his face helplessly as he restarted his bathing routine. She looked satisfied, and returned to copying his motions.

Now came the tough part. He bent his head under the water and started to scrub his hair. Until he was done, he would have no idea if she’d followed his lead or not. He thought he heard water displaced near him, and then a moment later he felt her hands settle onto his head and he froze. She wasn’t washing her hair, but she was touching his.

She pushed his hands out of his hair. Rubbed her fingers deep into his locks and gently scratched those near-deadly claws into his scalp. The sensation rocked him to his core, sending shivers through every part of his body. Nothing had _ever_ felt that good before. So good, in fact, that he had forgotten how important it was to breathe. The burn of his lungs felt secondary to this strange pleasure. He let the last of his breath out, and then coughed when the tiniest bit of water was accidentally inhaled back in.

Her hands disappeared instantly, leaving him to lift his head and take in a deep, burning breath. When he looked at her, he could see her hair was still dry, but she hadn’t moved away. She just looked up at him with an expression etched in curiosity and interest.

She liked touching him, he surmised. It made his toes curl with a weird sort of satisfaction to know that.

“Your turn?” He asked her, holding his hands out. She took a step back once his hands were closer to her, but he was trying to gesture back and forth between his head and hers to wordlessly express his offer. It wasn’t difficult for her to put it together and consider, but she took her time before finally doing something that - by all the laws of nature - she should absolutely not do.

She dipped her head under the water, and put her life in his hands.

This felt like a gift, similar to the one she’d given him in the early hours of the morning. He was careful with her, running his fingers through her matted locks without ever pulling a single thread. It would take more trust to do something as difficult as _combing_ all of it, so instead he focused on simply moving the hair through the water to clean as much of it as possible, and scratching up and down her scalp. If he could give her even a fraction of the feeling she’d given him, he was happy to do it.

Even as he lost himself to the rhythmic movements of cleaning her hair, he found himself questioning his actions. He knew his heart was getting entangled with this feral girl, and he also knew that there was no path these emotions could lead him down that wouldn’t end in pain. She couldn’t even understand him. And she belonged here, in the desert, in the only world she’d ever known. The world her family had brought her into. A world in which he did not belong.

His hands slowed, and she noticed. Her head lifted from the water, slipping under the open space his arms had created until she was all but in his arms. Her hair was dripping wet, plastered against her face messily. She looked even wilder, this way.

And even more beautiful.

“I don’t know how to help you.” He whispered as she inched closer. Her fingers were on the move, exploring the hills of his arms and shoulders as if she might find something of interest there. He shuddered. “I don’t know if I even should. Maybe you were better off before I interrupted your life. You shouldn’t trust me this much. I feel like I’m - spoiling you, somehow. Spoiling your instinct to survive.”

Her claw traced the thick line of his collarbone, and even the frigid waters he soaked in weren’t enough to quell his body’s reaction. He could feel his cock swelling underneath the water. He bent his lower body back to keep it away from her.

“Why me?” He asked her. She met his eyes, as if for a moment she understood that he was asking her a question. “Why not Poe? Or neither of us? Why are you so sure you can trust me? What could you be thinking?”

He reached up to brush her plastered hair out of her face, and his eyes begged her for answers. He could see her trying to understand, with her pretty furrowed brow and teeth-bitten lower lip. This time, when he tried to express himself with the insecurity swimming in his eyes, a dawning comprehension came over her. She finally seemed to understand.

Her hand dropped down under the water and surrounded his hard cock in a firm, but careful grip.

Kylo yelped when he felt it, and his first instinct was to pull away. When the first sting of a claw reminded him that she had initiated this hold and did not seem inclined to let go, he froze in place. She had the means to _badly_ injure him, and by the set of her eyebrows, she was ready to do it.

“Jesus Christ.” He breathed out, when he realized she was holding him hostage. “You’re - you’re - ”

She let go, and patted his chest fondly, before taking both of his hands and placing them on her head for more scritches.

Kylo couldn’t quite decide how to feel about the realization that this girl, whom he’d once considered an untouched innocent creature of the desert, was in fact trying to claim him for her mate. There was no innocence in the way she’d grasped at his manhood, firmly holding it as if to say _I know what this does and I claim it as my own_. She’d chosen him. Not out of some fantastical bond of love, he was sure. This was nature. She’d found a potential mate that suited her current needs, and she took him.

Well, she hadn’t taken him yet. In fact, Rey hadn’t looked interested in doing much more than just holding his cock like a firm handshake beforehand. Now she just wanted the lovely feelings he could give her with his touch.

So maybe she was innocent in some ways, he wagered. That did not change the very dangerous turn this relationship between them had taken. He’d just been thinking about how his _friendship_ with her might have damaged her sense of survival. This was a bit more serious than friendship. And a bit more dangerous.

He thought all of these things in silence, as he mechanically gave her exactly what she wanted, and methodically washed and scratched her scalp. She lifted her head to breathe again, but refused to let him pull away his hands. She did not want to let him stop, and when he eventually did, she grunted unhappily about it. She did not know the meaning of _enough_.

That, he thought with dawning horror, might be the biggest problem of all.

**Author's Note:**

> get out your bingo cards, the center square is 'Ben will be bitten'


End file.
